Have you ever thought of the best comeback only after it was too late? Right before bed, while taking a shower or standing in an elevator, you get your light-bulb moment: “Ahh, why didn’t I think of it before?” The French even came up with a term for that, l’esprit de l’escalier—the spirit of the staircase—and it means that the perfect retort arises only when it doesn’t matter anymore.
However, this does not apply to everyone. A select few have the superpower of coming up with snappy one-liners on the spot, and the r/CleverComebacks subreddit is the site to go for these legendary comments. As the moderators put it, “If someone just got shown up, this is the place to post it.“
So make sure to scroll down and upvote your favorite retorts! And if you can’t get enough of snappy comebacks, make sure to check out Bored Panda’s previous posts here, here and here.
He Was Asking For It!
If you’d like to share a post on the “Clever Comebacks“ subreddit page, there’s a few rules you need to follow. Firstly, you should know what a witty comment is. According to the moderators, it’s “responses to someone that, for lack of a better word, roasts them.” Also, baseless insults, tasteless jokes, “no, u” style replies are what they call garbage content, and nobody likes them.
When you think about it, the only obvious goal when trying to think of a snappy comeback is to get a good laugh and share your original thought. And the same applies to real-life situations. If you hate those awkward moments when your friends or coworkers throw you a snide comment and everything that comes to your mind just sounds lame, don’t worry. In real life, not many people can be as clever as Dr. House or Chandler Bing, but there’s a few ways you can improve your reactions and become wittier.
Bless This Woman
One of the things that could make you better is the world of improv acting. When it comes to showing your wit, timing is everything. The reply should be as spontaneous as the words that took you by surprise. One way of improving would be to become a better active listener. As Abigail Paul, workshop facilitator and training developer, told the BBC, “people think faster than others speak, giving the listener “extra time“ to compose an answer, even while they give the appearance of still listening to what the other person is saying.”
Come to think of it, there have been many times when we already wanted to share an idea with the person who’s not yet finished talking. “Most of us don’t listen to the whole message,” Paul said, “we are just waiting to make our own points.” So if you want to whip out snappy remarks, you should actively listen to what the other person is saying and use the unexpected material she or he gave you.
Not Be A Baby Machine
This Always Makes Me Laugh
Sometimes, when we receive a biting remark, we might feel offended. Belina Raffy, a business improvisation consultant, said that negative comments usually come from a place of insecurity. So when it comes to your coworker who constantly tosses you rude remarks, remember that responding positively might ease the pressure and keep projects going smoothly. ”Positive witty comments build trust among colleagues, bosses and subordinates, and they can turn a formerly harsh environment into an accepting one,” Raffy said.
It Was Social Distancing Haha
They Don’t Give A Damn
Another great tip would be silencing your inner critic: “It’s about letting go of the need to judge ourselves,” Raffy explains. You should try saying what’s on your mind without thinking about it. In improv theater, actors try to let go of their inner voice and give in to their “deepest fantasies” in order to say something spontaneous that they would never say in real life.
Oof. That Burn Needs Some Love
German History Lesson
A Punchline From Twitter, Does This Count As A Meme?
Someone Needs A Refresher On Anatomy
That’s A Good Proof
Got Roasted By A Police Twitter
A survey by Sprout Social suggests that such responses are actually not appreciated by customers. Brand personality should connect your product to its consumers but as it turns out, that’s not always the case. Sprout surveyed 1,000 consumers on which traits they want brands to share on social media and what action behaviors like humor or friendliness cause.
It Is Funny But True
Yep May Be It Is True
Whatever Your Weakness, There’s A Hellion To Exploit It
It seems that “three-quarters of consumers surveyed believe there’s value in brands exhibiting humor on social but only one-third actually want brands to bring on the snark full force.” The majority of consumers buy from brands that are honest, helpful and friendly. “It turns out that at the end of the day, consumers want brands to use social as a customer care channel”, Sprout explains. So while this kind of risky brand personality offers you a great deal of exposure, it seems that it’s actually bad for business.
Most Of Us Are Too
Elon Musk Gets Destroyed By Facts And Logic
Simple Math To Hard
Lastly, for a clever comeback to be considered great, it has to be honest. “The best retorts speak truth — when a person calls something that the other people didn’t see,” said Paul. “That’s generally what makes us laugh.” So if you think of a clever comeback that’s piercingly accurate and say it right there on the spot, you feel absolutely great because you know that you’ve earned it.
True Perfection Has Been Achieved
Old But Gold
Accessible Parking, But Only During Office Hours
I Swear It Was On
Jesus Statues vs. Police State
Finnally A Manager Making A Comeback
Found This While Browsing Instead Of Sleeping
Would You Like Some Whine With That?
F*cking Sheep
English Unchanged
He Makes A Good Point
Technically He Spoke Genders Into Existence Because By His Very Word He Can Create
I Prayed For Help And God Sent Doctors With The Vaccine, I Said “No Thanks, I’m Waiting For God To Help Me”
One For The Burn Ward
Mindy Kaling Shuttin’ ‘Em Down
Not Sure What Is The Objective Is Here?
Nasa Is Untrustworthy
It Really Is The Churches Motto Tho
The Real Deal
She Seems So Dumb
I’m Not A Gamer For Nothing
Why Do Some People Want Others To Have It Bad Cruz They Had ? Hope This Isn’t Already Here
Look I Made A Joke
Does Jlo Have A Reply To That?
In 1919 And 1920, At The Very Start Of His Career, Tolkien Worked On The Staff Of The Oxford English Dictionary; He Later Said Of This Time That He “.. Learned More In Those Two Years Than In Any Other Equal Period Of My Life”
#44
It Works Both Ways!
He Wants The Ring Please
Don’t Mistake Empathy For Weaknesses
Getting Schooled
Fake Incest Go!
State Representative Got Owned!
He Really Went There
